Obituaries for women promote stereotypes

I was reading the obituaries lately and realized that longest and most detailed peices are about women. Not only that, but the words used to describe these women  are quite telling.  One in particular read: “In high school she was voted the student most likely to succeed …  she was “the embodiment of everything that is good in this world- demure, unassuming, devoted, selfless, gentle, courageous, classy, elegant, and generous.” I think it would have been more appropriate to say she did a great job at meeting the expectations of her generation – and this served her freinds and family very well. But as for the world at large, I am not so sure. I do not want to be known as being demure, devoted and selfless. The “nice” mother. I would rather be known for speaking up and telling the truth with compassion and love and for refusing to be squeezed into a tiny stereotype. Perhaps I need to write my obituary now, to remind me of my life goals.

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